Last week I mentioned my husband was starting some medical treatments. I kept it vague because I wasn’t sure how much to share, or if I should share at all.
But then I remembered something: when I had cancer 12 years ago, sharing my story was one of the most valuable things I did. It connected me with people going through similar struggles. It allowed others to support me. And it allowed me to support them back.
But on the last day, my husband ended up in the ER, unable to urinate. He got a catheter and started months of what we now call “catheter hell” – tests, treatments, more tests. They kept saying it wasn’t cancer. Prostate issues in older men are common, and it’s usually not cancer.
Except this time it was.
He finally had surgery in October, and that’s when they found it. Stage 4. Already spread beyond the prostate.
Here’s the strange thing: I told him that “emergency” at Disneyland probably saved his life. If it hadn’t happened, we might never have found the cancer until it was too late.
So what does this mean for us right now?
My husband started radiation this week. He’ll also be doing chemo and is already on hormone therapy. The doctors are optimistic – prostate cancer, even at stage 4, can often be managed for many years with proper treatment. We’re hopeful. We’re taking it one day at a time.
And yes, it’s affecting my business. I’m spending time at his appointments. I’m more selective about what I take on. I’m learning to say no to things that used to seem important but aren’t anymore.
But here’s what hasn’t changed:
I’m still breeding incredible Maremmas. I’m still supporting my clients through every stage of their journey with these amazing dogs. I’m still writing to you every week. I’m still here.
5-month-old Leo heading off to his new home in Oregon Wednesday morning
I’m sharing this for a few reasons:
First, because some of you are going through hard things too. Maybe it’s health issues, family struggles, financial stress, grief, or just the weight of trying to keep everything together while the world feels heavy. If that’s you, I want you to know: you’re not alone. And you’re doing better than you think you are.
Second, because I’ve already had a few clients connect with me over this in beautiful ways. One is an oncologist who specializes in prostate cancer – she actually guessed what my husband had before we even got the official diagnosis, and gave me valuable advice. Another client has known what was going on for months and always asks about Steve. Another is a client who went through the same thing and spent time sharing his experience with my husband when he was here picking up his puppy a few weeks ago. That gave him so much hope. These conversations are gifts.
Third, because telling our stories – even the hard ones – is how we find each other. It’s how we realize we’re not the only ones struggling. And sometimes, being able to share our story is as much of a blessing as receiving support.
So that’s where I am. Moving forward, you might notice I’m a little slower to respond sometimes, or that I’m being more intentional about where I spend my energy. Now you know why.
And if you’re in a season where you’re also trying to hold everything together while dealing with something hard? Take a deep breath. Give yourself some grace. You’re doing better than you think.
I’ll be back next week with something lighter – probably cute puppy photos and farm updates. Because life is both hard and beautiful, and we need both.
Thank you for being here.
Kim
P.S. – If you want to support us, the best way is to keep being part of this community. Keep asking questions, keep sharing your own stories, and if you know someone looking for an incredible Maremma, send them my way. That helps more than you know.
P.P.S. Want to see why I’m such a fan of clicker training? Watch 5-month-old Leo training at a busy airport while waiting for his flight to Oregon. This was only his second time leaving my farm (the first time was Monday, when he went to the vet.) He was not at all bothered by the noisy airport. He was just focused on engaging with me to earn yummy treats. That’s the beauty of positive reinforcement and proper socialization. It builds dogs that take new experiences in stride.
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